Auctions

Was driving out to Jessica's last week when I heard about an auction.It was equipment from a pain management office in Chattanooga.I love auctions and I love getting a good deal.At first I was all consumed with accessing the value of the equipment and figuring out what I could pay for it.I had these big plans for setting up an office.The bidding process was ongoing for three days. At the end of day two I was winning about 80% of the bids?On the final day the bidding went crazy and I came home with only one lot:a typewriter, a brief case ,two clocks,and an enormous bag of Halls cough drops all for $18.
Wednesday I went to pick up my bargains and in passing asked the auctioneer why the clinic closed.He said the doctor,in his early 40's had a mountain bike accident and was a quadriplegic .I asked if I could walk through the clinic.As I did I was taken with how nice and up to date everything was.How "comfortable" it must have been for his patients and what a tremendous loss for everyone.
One day you are on top of the world-active,wealthy,happy,making a difference,and in an instant your world changes.You can't dress ,bath, or feed yourself?You can't even breathe on your own.Your career is over..Surviving is about all you have the energy for and some days it is just too much.A year has passed and you can breathe without a ventilator and you can drive your wheelchair with your left arm.You can talk and laugh and smile now.
I started off looking for equipment and found something so much more valuable-inspiration from another human being.

November 19th

November 19 th marked 4 years since I got out of hell.The days events still flash before me.Jessica and Mom picked me up at about 1030 and I drove home from Tiptonville,Tn.You don't really appreciate driving unless you have been unable to for about two years.They say going to prison is as close as you will get to dying.I found that to be true as well.You find out that life goes on with or without you.It was a challenging time for all of us and the challenges linger on still.Its kind of like a tattoo that you can never get off of you.The biggest lesson I learned was that I needed God.I wanted to be real and genuine to everyone especially to my family.I studied the Bible,memorized scripture,prayed and listened for God's voice.I had patty caked with those things before but I had an abundant life as for as worldly things go.On the outside it looked like I had things going my way.My wife and I never argued but we never really confronted anything either.We were taking care of foster kids-devotion every morning,church on Sunday and occasionally on Wednesday.Our natural kids all successful.I knew I was in a bad place spiritually when I no longer could pick up my Bible much less read it.But of course I would never ask for help.I could handle this as I had everything else in my life.No time to analyze my feelings or why I had so much anger in my heart.
I won't kid you the last six years have been my hardest ever.I just figured at 60 I wouldn't be pondering my next career move or That I might be perceived as a threat to anyone.There is an old expression that says if it doesn't kill you it will make you stronger.I believe that.

In Everything Give Thanks

It is something easy to say but much harder to do -"In everything give thanks".A few days ago I was reminded of how unforgiving and judgemental people are as well as the power of social media.When you and your family are victimized by this it is easy to feel angry and frustrated.You may feel like yelling and screaming or even "wanting to beat someone up.You might even grab the phone book and look up lawyers in the yellow pages- not even sure if we have a phone book now. Those are very human type reactions which we all can relate to on some level.The next day while reading My Upmost for His Highest the title of the devotion was In Everything Give Thanks.After reading that I smiled and said "God that is something only You could Do-send a message that I needed to hear at just the right time.We all question things if we are honest.It is hard to be thankful for everything that comes our way.But what a way to honor God.A way to say to Him and all those we love that no matter what circumstances we face we trust You Lord and we give thanks.